unspeakable relief
hope in Yahweh! for with Yahweh there is steadfast love, and with him is plentiful redemption Ps130:7
This past Sunday morning, I awoke feeling the weight of my sin.
I felt cold and far from God.
I felt condemned and burdened and ugly.
It’s a real bummer to wake up like that, I’m here to tell you…you know, in case that has never happened to you.
It’s an even bigger bummer, when you are a preacher, and you wake up like that, knowing that in just a few hours you need to get up before hundreds of people and joyfully declare the wonders of God’s love and forgiveness in Jesus when you aren’t seeing or feeling either.
And to answer the question some may be asking right now, “Yes, preachers and pastors feel this way too. We’re just normal humans trying our best with the Spirit’s help to get one step closer to Jesus, while sometimes feeling far from him.”
Dear reader, part of the reason I feel moved to share this is because my experience yesterday morning taught me all over again the value of community as a disciple of Christ. To have people who know you, and get you, who you can reach out to and be honest with, and they’ll give counsel and pray for you.
I’ve had the privilege of having such a friend for 14+ years now. His name is Dominic, and for most of that time, we were pastors in the same city in Minnesota together. We met and talked often. He even preached once at the church I pastored there. We’re still friends, though separated by a few states. And we still pray for each other every Sunday morning.
Dominic is a Godly man, a faithful pastor, an excellent preacher, a doting husband, and a loving father.
And he’s one of my best friends.
So this past Sunday, I sent him this text:
My heart feels heavy with my own sin this morning.
Fighting to feel forgiven and a child of the King.
After about 60 seconds, here is how he responded via text:
“There is therefore now… NO CONDEMNATION… for those who are in Christ Jesus!”
And then, after about another 60 seconds, he texted this:
I just read this… a few minutes ago….
“What unspeakable relief it is to the bewildered, troubled soul, oppressed with a sense of his own unworthiness, and distressed because of frequent failures to live up to his own highest resolves, when he learns that God sees him in Christ Jesus, and as thus seen he is free from all condemnation.
He may exclaim, "But I feel so condemned."
This, however, is not the question.
It is not how I feel but it is what God says.”
“Oh, doubting one,
look away then altogether from self and state,
look away from frames and feelings to Christ risen,
now forever beyond the cross where your sins once put Him,
and see yourself in Him,
exalted there at God's right hand.
He would not be there if the sin question was not settled to the divine satisfaction.
The fact that He is there and that you are seen by God in Him is the fullest possible testimony to your freedom from all condemnation.
Oh, the peace forever flowing
From God's thoughts of His own Son,
Oh, the peace of simply knowing
On the cross that was all done.”
Ironside
It wasn’t as if that series of texts were a magic wand that Dominic waved, and all my feelings of shame, doubt, and unforgiveness immediately evaporated. It was still a difficult morning, and day. However, I had words to fight the fight of faith with, saved in a text string, that I went back to again and again yesterday, and yet again today. And I knew I had a friend who knew me that morning, and still loved me, and was with me, and was praying for me.
I wasn’t alone. I was fully known, and fully loved.
Dominic was with me.
And so was Jesus.
Maybe you awoke today feeling like I did yesterday, or you feel that way now. It is my prayer for you, dear reader, as I type, that Ironside’s words via my friend Dominic will be a deep encouragement to you, for how God feels about you because of what Jesus had done for you.
If you’re not too big to accept it.
And, it is also my prayer that you will have the courage to open up to someone else, and share your burden, so that they can help you carry it.
Take the risk to open up to another disciple of Jesus.
By God’s grace, I pray you will also discover the truth that you are not alone.
Live creatively, friends. If someone falls into sin, forgivingly restore him, saving your critical comments for yourself. You might be needing forgiveness before the day’s out. Stoop down and reach out to those who are oppressed. Share their burdens, and so complete Christ’s law. If you think you are too good for that, you are badly deceived.
Galatians 6:1-3, The Message Paraphrase
